I treated myself to some real news this weekend. I stepped away from my computer, got in the car, drove into town and handed over some of the Mister’s hard-earned money for the weekend edition of a national newspaper.
I forgot how much fun it is to hold actual newsprint in my hand.
I’m still wiping the ink off my fingers.
Just keep your hands where I can see 'em.
I spent about four hours reading the paper front-to-back. Way more time than when I’m online. I even read some of the ads, which I never do…I can’t click that X fast enough when getting my virtual news fix.
Of all the articles I read, one stuck a little longer than usual. It was a letter from a woman in the middle of a dress dilemma. She was at a party and one of the other wives liked her dress. This woman told the other wife where she had bought the dress and weeks later was dismayed to see this woman wearing a dress by the same designer and was told…”I bought the exact same dress you wore to the party.” Gee whiz and gosh darn it.
Now this woman is worried they’ll show up at the same event…in the same dress.
Oh, the horror! The style guide guy got all sarcastic, which I loved. He basically said he didn’t see a problem…was she worried that one of them would burst into flame? It was a good response.
Just not good enough.
This guy didn’t get the real reason she was worried. It wasn’t the dress…it was who was going to look BETTER in the dress.
Women compete over everything. Better jobs, better haircuts, better husbands, better kids. No way in hell was she looking for a sarcastic response…one that told her she was basically an idiot.
NOT. AT. ALL.
She wanted to be told that she was in the right. That the other woman should burn in Hell for such a transgression. That no one could possibly look as good as her in that dress and that the other woman should bow down in shame and immediately dress in a burlap sack and baggy hose.
If you’ve read this far you, like me, know the truth. This woman has no dress sense, the dress is probably the wrong color for her and is two sizes to small.
I like my boobs like I like my men...all saggy and shit.
If I’d seen this story online, I probably would not have bothered to click the link. But that’s what’s so great about a real newspaper…sometimes you get all the news that’s fit to print.
My law of fashion is simple. Wear what feels good. Wear what you want.
My wife tends to complicate it a little further than that. Frequently (every morning?) she can be heard to exclaim: “You’re not leaving the house looking like that, are you?”
Try as I might, I can’t even imagine what could possibly be wrong. I just won the my version of the lotto. I had found all clean clothes to wear. What could be better?
That first image is way cool. The second one seems to be violating both of my simple fashion rules, but hey, who knows? Maybe it makes her feel good look like that.
I forget…you’re the guy in support of white socks with sandals…right?
It’s been known to happen. I still don’t see the issue.
Sometimes I don’t understand women…and I are one.
I forgot to respond to your images comment…yes, the first one rocks. The second one…she’s clearly insane. Look who she’s with.
So goddamn true about (a lot) of women. Also, since we’re on the topic, I think a lot of people ask for advice looking for justification for what they’re already feeling. They don’t actually want advice, they just want to be told that THEY ARE RIGHT. And then they throw a hissy fit when someone disagrees.
You could say that people who dress like they are blind are blind but that would be an insult to blind people. You could also say they are extremely self confident…I say they don’t own a mirror.
I’m with you: I love to hold a “real” paper! There’s something so nice about folding and unfolding and refolding it as I read (I’m rather small, so it must be folded or it’s a paper bedsheet).
About the dress: I never “got” all that middle school bullshite. Still don’t. So it’s who’ll look BETTER about the same clothing thing? The only time in my recollection that I showed up wearing the same outfit was 1st grade photo day. Lisa G and I wore the same outfit (both natural gingers w/ freckles, too) and we thought it was fun. Guess it depends on the woman. Some would think it’s funny/ cute and some would worry about who’s well, cute.
I think I’m going to make buying a weekend paper a regular weekend activity. Another chance to sit on my ass and read. What’s not to love?
On the dress, the style guy was funny but he missed the question hidden in her letter. I’ll see what he has to say thing weekend…at the least I got a blog post out of it.
I used to spend hours of a Sunday doing that back to back thing. It’s grand. Also, many years ago, I worked in an office within a library (nothing to do w/ library BUT they allowed us to snag their papers–and bring them back, of course). I didn’t always have time but I ate those things up when I did! It was so cool being able to read several different cities. I don’t think I’d ever had that available before (18-20-ish).
I bought the weekend paper again but haven’t had the time or space to delve in…guests. I feel like I’m running a B&B only with money going out, not in.
What I wouldn’t give for a copy of the New York Sunday Times and absolute silence for about 4 hours.