email-etiquette

Practice Good Blogging Etiquette, Leave Your Readers Satisfied

Immersing myself in a variety of new and Freshly Pressed blogs recently, I found myself distracted. (It happens. Pause for shocked reaction.) Here’s the thing: it wasn’t  the writing. Most of the posts were well written and a few engaging enough to follow.

The number of new blogs dropped every day? Impressive. And yet something was bothering me. I felt vaguely unsatisfied. What was I missing?

Then the voice that lives in my head had a wha-huh? moment and in her best Bette Midler impersonation, belted out: NO COMMENT REPLIES!

It was a tectonic shift in blog commenting behavior and it’s left me wanting.

Replace dressing with commenting and you've got style.
Replace dressing with commenting and you’ve got style. (image via Wiki)

If you’re like me, writing a post is as much about diving into your word pool as it is about paddling with your blogging friends.

Two things that go together like a sunny day and a smile.

When you choose not to reply to comments, what you’re putting out there to your readers is only half the story.

I subscribe to the Sex in the City form of blogging. There’s a scene in one of the early episodes where Carrie and gang is invited to a baby shower for an old friend who used to live in Manhattan. Now Lannie lives in Connecticut and is expecting her first child. Charlotte, Miranda and Samantha are voicing their opinions about why they shouldn’t leave the island to schlep all the way to another state. And Carrie says,

“When you see an accident on the side of the road, you pull over. Lannie’s having a baby. YOU PULL OVER!”

In this comment scenario, I’m Carrie.

Call me old school but replying to comments is good blogging etiquette. We say please and thank you to complete strangers every day. This practice of good manners also has a place online. In this day of frantic social media-itis, you need to hop off the merry-go-round. If only for a few minutes. Reading your comments and engaging in some chatty back-and-forth helps establish a connection between you and your readers. You get to slow down and enjoy the ride.

Writing is hard work. You have to be committed yet willing to strip off your cloak of perfectionism. It’s a fine line. You want every word to be pitch perfect but if you spend your time waiting for that to happen, you’ll never hit “publish.”

Once you’ve girded your loins and your post is live, that’s when the real fun begins. The pressure is off. That post you sweated multiple beads over is out there and you’ve started a conversation.

Sure, you can go back and edit what you’ve written. We all suffer from writers’ anxiety. I call that feeling “post interruptus.” Ignore it. Because it’s time to see if your post resonated with your readers.

It’s time to pull over.

If your readers are anything like mine, they’re pretty savvy. If you’re really lucky, they “get” you. With all your bumps and warts. Some of the best times I’ve had blogging have been when someone posted a comment that got me thinking. Not about editing the piece but about how everyone has their own perspective and for me, it’s like a refresh in my mind. The twinkle of an idea forms. Pretty soon, it’s demanding my attention. And it won’t quit me ’till it’s feed and watered.

We complain of being busy. And we are. That’s life. But busy isn’t an excuse for not replying to comments. In this instance, the saying “if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all” does not apply. Worst case scenario, you come off as uninterested. And no one wants to feel that what they have to say doesn’t matter.

So the next time you write a post, don’t send it out there and then ignore it like it’s some lonely orphan child. Look to your comments for future inspiration and remember to engage your reply button.

It could be a blog-changing experience. For you and your readers.

Are you a comment-friendly blogger?

 (feature image via Mashable)

687 thoughts on “Practice Good Blogging Etiquette, Leave Your Readers Satisfied”

  1. I absolutely agree with you. I’m astounded not just in this world but other social media platforms and even “real-life” people are failing to acknowledge a comment or a kind word or even a gift. I’m not sure what has happened there. I’m so weird sometimes I thank people for their thank you notes!

    >

    1. I’ve noticed this before but over the past couple of weeks it just seems to have ballooned. A lot of the comments I read were really nice…about the topic or the writing. And they were just left there, hanging. I didn’t put this in my post but I find it quite rude.

      Let’s not do that anymore.

      1. “Let’s not do that anymore”..
        You are so sweet for saying that.
        Imagine if there were tickets for leaving comments unacknowledged. I can hear the controversy just thinking about it.

      2. Is there ever a comment that is so trivial that it doesn’t require a response? I suppose that if it is a simple “Nice!” then you can reply with a similar single-word comment, “thanks” or better yet “ty” In other words, make the depth of the reply commensurate with that of the comment. Bottom line, though, you make a great point here, thanks for making it! Best,
        D

        1. I do like to make points. It’s one of my favorite things to do around here. *grin*

          Neat idea to calibrate the reply to the comment. I wonder if I’ve ever been that brief commenting? Hmmm.

          Thanks for swinging by and being the opposite of terse.

      3. Hi! :) I have my own blog but I don’t usually read the “freshly pressed” posts on wordpress. All i know is to post my portfolio on the website that i’ve created. Im not aware of what’s happening around here in wordpress. Then I felt happy when some good people are liking my posts

        1. It’s always a pleasant surprise when someone finds your blog and takes the time to comment. I don’t always read Freshly Pressed myself but when I do I usually find some good stuff.

          Thanks for commenting!

      4. Hi! :) I just wanna say that I liked you blog. :) This is my first time to read “freshly pressed” posts because all I know is to post photos on my portfolio. Haha I don’t even write on my posts. Just photos. Because I’m not that good in writing.

        But recently I’ve been having some likes from people that I don’t even know. And I felt happy when one gave his comment. Haha so I replied as soon as i’ve read it. Then I became more interested on how does things happen around wordpress. It looks like fun and I enjoyed reading interesting posts from strangers rather than reading nonsense news feed from Facebook.

        I want to improve my writings skills so I think I’d better continue to read and try to write more. :)

        Thanks for inspiring me! :)

        1. You are welcome!

          WordPress is one of the nicest platforms for blogging. So many great bloggers, so many great blogs. You should take some time to explore, especially the photography blogs. I think you’ll enjoy the experience!

    2. Ha ha! I work in a café, and my vocabulary basically consists of ‘Thank you and ‘You’re welcome’. The other day I got mixed up and said to a customer, ‘Thor welcome.’ Whoops!
      I am always amused by the overly grateful customers. I once had a couple who managed to say ‘Thank you’ 8 times just over my pouring them water. I had to switch off my hearing after that because I knew I couldn’t handle them saying ‘Thank you’ approximately 48 more times throughout the meal.

      1. I had a similar experience the other day, but mixing up English and ‘Aussie’. After being thanked for giving directions, I merged “No worries” and “You’re welcome” to tell her “No welcome”. Not the nicest response :/

    3. There is no greater insult to someone than than to ignore him/her. There is no faster, more sure-fire, fool-proof way to infuriate another human being than to ignore him/her. This sad phenomenon indicates a fundamental breakdown in common courtesy, decency and civility, the source of which is probably a pathological focus on the self to the complete exclusion of the needs and feelings of others. It’s just plain rude, and rude people eventually discover one day that they themselves alone–and ignored. I agree, it’s a terrible development, very disturbing. In Yeats’ poem, really a prayer, for his daughter he said, “In courtesy I’d have her chiefly learned.” Why? Because it’s the basis of a civilized life and the dynamic that binds a people, a civilization, together altruistically, maklng them stronger, more secure and happier. Thank you for this post ;)

      1. Well said. Thanks for your thoughts on this really bizarre behavior. It’s something I’m having a hard time getting my head around. I think I get it if someone considers their written piece an “article” of information. That’s not a blog. If you ask someone to “leave a comment” as most blogger do, why are you asking if you don’t want to participate in a discussion? That’s when you should turn off comments.

        Yes, some blogs have readers who are happy to chat amongst themselves, they know each other, they’ve come across each other on other blogs, or they all just read each other. And that’s good. Great fun for them. But how about the person who wants more, asks questions, challenges you, or is looking for feedback? In this case, ignorance is not bliss. It’s exposure. Of your bad manners.

        Got a little wound up. Sorry. Stuff like this gets on my last nerve. *grin*

      2. Beautifully, beautifully put. I’m actually going through this right now with a local newspaper publisher, who flattered me by asking me to write some cultural pieces which I believe I am doing for free – stupid me – but their communication and acknowledgment is abysmal. And she just rejected a story I sent her that is exactly the pitch I gave with flippant “we don’t do those. “Well neither do I.

      1. Hey. Hi!

        Another good question. I love getting real mail and try to find any excuse to send someone something by mail.
        I must miss paper cuts. *smile*

        I’m trying to find someone locally to help with an upholstery project…four phone calls and three emails and…crickets.

        It’s a head scratcher.

  2. I should say something, shouldn’t I? I should write a reply.
    What am I going to say? She’s BlogDramedy! And she’s going to READ this reply and she’s going to COMMENT.
    OMG…ok, calm down. . .you can do this. You. . . can . . . do . . . this…Ready? Loins girded? Ok. . . go. . .

    Great post!

  3. When someone posts a comment on my blog, I realize and fully appreciate the fact they took time out of their day to do so. There are 5 bajillion blogs out there, and the thought that someone paused for a second to not only read mine, but also offer their 2 cents, is amazing to me. It merits a reply…always!

    I mean, they’re half the reason I’m inspired to keep posting! If I was blogging in a vacuum, I don’t know how long I’d stick with it. When a post inspires dialogue, that’s when things get fun.

    Commenting bloggers are surely the best bloggers on the planet. I agree, leave comment replies. It’s the least you can do!

    1. Well said. *applause*

      And you are so right…so many blogs, so many comments. So many happy readers when you acknowledge their existence.

      Let’s get tee shirts made!

      1. Let’s!

        I’ll start brainstorming…

        Here’s one off the top of my head:

        Front of shirt: Every time you reply to a comment, and angel gets its wings.

        Back of shirt: Every time you ignore a comment, M. Night Shyamalan starts making a movie.

        Meh. I’ll keep working on it.

  4. Very well put. I feel bad when I can’t get to comments for a few days even, I don’t want people to think that I am ignoring their opinion or acknowledgement.

    What I really dislike among the non-commenters is when you ask a question and there is no follow up. I get that the reader/notification system gets messed up and that it takes time to get to these, but it’s the thought. Sure, most of what I right is for me to get things out of my system, but if someone notices then surely they want to learn more or are maybe in the same situation and can help.

    1. We shouldn’t feel guilty about not getting back to comments right away but I think if you’re basically a nice person you can’t help but feel an obligation to respond. We can’t get to them all at the minute they are posted but we can get to them. And we should.

      The whole question follow up…I chalk it up to short attention spans. Sometimes people get caught up in a post and then get distracted and they’re off! Something to do with Kim Kardashian and if she’s baring cleavage, or not. Although it never seems to be the not. *grin*

  5. Amen! My absolute favorite part of blogging is when I get to have a conversation with the readers. I get we’re all super busy (I’m ridiculously busy this summer more than usual) but I always at least try to reply to comments, even if it’s the week after I post.

    (By the way, this post should be FP’d)

    1. You get me, sister. This is so true. Even a “thanks for reading” reply is so appreciated. As humans and bloggers, we’re sometimes starved for attention…life is so busy. Taking the time to say I see you or I hear what you’re saying? Mucho importante.

  6. You know me, I always comment on comments. I do have a couple of boob reports that I skipped commenting on while recovering. By the time my head cleared, weeks had passed.

    The WP editors wrote a post that pops up when we blog, about ways to increase followers. They mention commenting on comments and commenting on other blogs. I think a lot of these writers are newbies and don’t know the protocol.

    Once in a while I remind FP authors to comment.
    “Dude! Congrats on being FP’d! You might want to comment on some of these comments.” Nothing but crickets. *chirp*
    This should get FP’d!!

    1. Crickets get a bad rap. I should have mentioned this in my post. The harm some bloggers are doing to those chirpy little critters is criminal.

      Yes, you are a very comment-friendly commenter. But then, you’re everything friendly.
      But stay away from being friendly with guys like this:

      Jeremy Meeks, the latest face of Facebook.
      Jeremy Meeks, the latest face of Facebook.

        1. It’s his mugshot. From a recent arrest in Stockton, CA.
          It went viral. Go figure.

          I expect any day now to hear he’s signed up a publicist. *bangs head against desk, repeatedly*

          1. Actually his family are using his unexpected fame to raise money to pay for his legal fees! Also, he is married and his wife isn’t too impressed with the attention LOL! Newsflash sweetie you wouldn’t be getting all this attention if your Hubby wasn’t a criminal. :)

  7. So if I comment I’m creating more work for you? Sold! :)

    Don’t tell anyone, but the only reason I blog is those moments of interaction that sometimes happen at the end. Without those? Why bother?

    And I agree with you: Commenting on the comments is good form.

    I don’t think that felon mugshot guy is good looking.

    1. A busy mind is the devil’s carport. Or something like that. The reason you blog? Me too! I like to feel I’ve reached out and touched somebody. Note: pick up more of those plastic gloves.

      If someone comments in the woods and no one is around to see the comment, is it still a comment? Squirrels say damn straight.

      I think he’s criminally handsome but no, he doesn’t do it for me, either.
      You know who’s my type. *grin*

  8. There are some uber-popular bloggers with gazillion of active followers who are perfectly content to talk to each other in the comments. Maybe the bloggers you’re referring to sincerely believe they fall into that category – and I know that FP can give them that impression. :)

    1. Cross-comment conversations are awesome.
      But to put a post out there and not reply to even one comment? Even a general “you guys rock?”
      That’s not acceptable.

      So being FP’d is unwritten permission to ignore comments? I am so not loving that.

      But then, I’m not an uber-popular blogger. If I was? I’d uber advertise and then hire someone to reply to my comments. *grin*

  9. I always try to reply to comments. I just have trouble getting the blasted comments in the first place. ;) As for other blogs, if I don’t have time to comment, I at least like it and tweet it.

    1. That’s nice. We should all be so nice. Gold star-shaped cookie for you!

      And we bloggers should remember: every time you reply to a comment, a kitten gets a double serving of catnip.

  10. You know me. ;) I don’t blog under a pseudonym. I try to be mindful of the comments I put out there. I don’t always follow my own advice, too.

    What am I trying to comment here? Pfff. I don’t know. I just need a friend who laughs at my stuff.

    1. Your comments make me laugh. Except when they make me snort.

      Don’t stop doing that.

      (Sending you an email with a very important question. You can save us both a lot of time by just saying “yes.”)

  11. I respond out of deep, heart-felt gratitude and relief that someone actually read the piece. But I feel I should send cash, too. Or cars. I can’t, of course, but feel I should. You’re on the BMW list, by the way.

    1. I think you might be write. Right?

      You’d think by now you’d know to roam the Internet with a travel-sized bottle of air freshener. Get LAP to cough up some petty cash.

      1. Well that’s an idea… perhaps you could invent finger extensions for the avid polite blogger. “Fingertips not feeling so fresh ever since you were Freshly Pressed? Score a set of Fred’s Finger Extensions today and stop those fingertips from blunting away”

        1. Brilliant idea. You should set up shop on Etsy. Start making them now and you’ll be ready for Christmas. Because who wouldn’t want a set of finger extensions as a gift?

  12. Dear BD,
    I’ve never seen Sex in the City, so I cannot quote my favorite line, but a couple of my female coworkers never missed an episode. For some reason, they’ve started calling me by one of the show character’s name. Should I be flattered?
    Sincerely,
    Mr. Big

    1. Should you be flattered? That’s a delicate question. If I say yes, you’ll want to know why. If I say no, you’ll want to know why.

      Let’s just say…when they call you Mr. Big, it’s not what you think.

        1. Actually, if you watch Sex in the City, the Movie (the proposal scene near the end) you’ll notice Mr. Big has surprisingly small feet.

          That scene has haunted me for years.

                    1. Hey there! Thanks.

                      I have time for anyone. Although you might score a few extra minutes on the clock.

                      Size doesn’t matter to me as long as they don’t make themselves appear larger than they are… through the use of hot air. *grin*

  13. I am with you on this one. If you can’t be bothered to reply, I promise you I can’t be bothered to comment the next time. I always reply, even if it is only with a thank you. You are so right, it is simply good etiquette.

  14. I love reading and responding to blog comments! I have made some great blogging buddies that way (and have become friends with fellow authors as well).

    1. Responding to comments is a big deal for me. “Attention must be paid” is this blog’s tagline. So true!
      Thanks for the link. Let me go take a peek… *smile*

  15. This is so true. Engaging with readers is a key part of developing positive relationships with them and showing that you value them. After all, people reading your blog is kind of the WHOLE POINT of blogging.

  16. I couldn’t agree more. However, I do hate it when people just say “Thanks for the comment” because it makes me feel like the copy-paste that to every person. I will say that most of my comments don’t receive a reply. I don’t take it personal. Except for when I do.

    1. Thanks for the comment!

      See what I did? I added an exclamation point just for you.

      We take time to comment. A response shows someone’s paying attention. Let’s share the blog love, people!

  17. I completely agree with you. My favorite part about blogging is interacting with readers. Otherwise, I might as well just write in my journal.

    1. No one is an island. And that sentiment applies to blogging.
      Journalling is a good outlet but sometimes you need the feedback that blogging can bring.
      It’s nice to feel you’re part of something bigger than your post.

  18. I am not sure you are on the right tract here. Many of us don’t get comments or they are few and far in-between. Many so called bloggers out there are here on w.p. for the ego ride.. They have a nasty habit of instantly liking posts, at the moment of publication.. There have been a number of posts on this topic. It takes time and patients to weed out these cheats, and i don’t thank them for wasting my time. I had one guy who “liked” every post i published. When i questioned him on why he liked each and every post, yet never made a comment. He replied, “well he liked the post but it was too long, or it confused him.” I think he wrote about 10 replies to that question just to let himself of the hook. Why then did he like the post in the first place? Now that beats me!

    eve

    1. Every comment deserves a reply.
      Those people who only “like” a post are after something other than a comment conversation. Yes, sometimes you are pressed for time and can’t come up with “the perfect comment.” Not everything has to be perfect. A simple “nicely done” works nicely. *grin*

      I’m impressed you pressed that guy about his “liking” behavior. Well done, you!

      1. thanks. Yes, I’d had enough of the cheating and was not going to allow it to cont. My time is valuable and this lack of respect by irresponsible bloggers is truly uncool.. Today, I have posted or published. In this new post i mentioned “twice” “that it would be nice to hear from readers.. Most don’t comment regardless of being asked to contribute. (These are not new people to blogger nor my blog.) I honestly don’t think they read the post. eve

        1. I get that feeling, too, sometimes. Or I get a comment that indicates they completely sailed past the point of the post. That in itself can be quite amusing. (And another idea for a post. Thanks!)

    1. Sometimes I think it’s the best part of blogging. I love it when people write a comment that just nails the post.
      It’s the best part of waking up some days. *smile*

  19. Yes! Yes and yes some more. Comments, appreciation, prompted thoughts and memories are part of blogging. I wonder how many writers of old would have loved the opportunity to interact with those who read their works. I see it as a responsibilty to respond. And a joy.

    1. Responding to comments should give you a happy. If not, you’re doing something wrong.
      I think writers from early times would have so loved it if they could have interacted directly with their readers.
      Gives one pause to think about that. Thanks for that “pause.”

  20. Congrats on FP👐. The only way I found you. And if this post is an accurate representation of ‘you’, then, I ‘get’ you.

    I think some of the problem with replying to comments is the fear that it will be re-replied, then re-re-replyed, yada, yada, yada.😶

    Rock On!

    1. Thank you!

      Yep, it’s the real me. Part of the real me. I have a few other parts that include being demanding and fussy. Plus lots of humor parts. Sometimes I can’t keep track.

      I’m rockin’. You do the same.

  21. Nice point you made. I reply to each and every comment, bcoz that’s d fun part of putting up post. As a reader and commenter, I would feel badly ignored and unimportant if my comment isn’t replied to….

  22. Comments are an extension of the blog post. Your readers tell you more about what kind of a blog you have than the title you type in the header or the tags you select. It’s the whole As Above, So Below thing: as you publish, so shall you be read. You’ll attract what you are.

    But it’s just as much the style and personality of the writing as it is the topic. I write hiking stories but plenty of my followers aren’t outdoorsy. I’m heavy on the snark, humor, and sarcasm so they come for the laughs and stay for the nature photography.

    If you ever want to change the kind of comments you’re getting, ask yourself what about the current crop of readers is off-putting, then ask yourself if that same vibe might be running through your posts–or you. There’s always a match, it’s just tricky to see the forest for the trees sometimes.

    But you’re right: a comment is a person. Not responding is like not giving a person eye contact when they are speaking. Only the truly putrid replies deserve to be ignored. For mine, I only leave a comment when I can see that the author acknowledges and responds to them thoughtfully Otherwise, it’s like talking into a broken answering machine.

    1. Some excellent points in your comment. You are what you blog. And a fine topic for another post. Thank you for the idea. *grin*

      Love the line “…is like not giving a person eye contact…” Because so true.

      1. Take the idea and run. Research is a snap–just go through the top ten blogs you follow and ask yourself what those bloggers would be like to attend a formal dinner party with, change a flat tire with, go on a road trip with. Your brain will automatically do a personality sweep of their blogging oeuvre and print out a report.

        Yeah, the eye contact thing drives me nucking futs. I have never in my life wanted so much to hurl an inanimate object across the room as when a conversation partner hands the floor over to me and then immediately looks down at that damned smartphone and starts jabbing at it.

        Next time it happens, I’m going to cry, “Look out!” in a panicked voice to freak them out and make them look up. Then, I’ll respond calmly, “Because a real, live human being is about to say something.”

        1. I do exactly that with people I meet. We take so much trouble over preparing meals at our house, I only want the best to take a seat around our table. Makes for fabulous conversation, too. Life’s too short to try to complete with a smartphone.

          Loving the sarcasm I’m hearing, by the way.

  23. Cool and interesting….you are a blog diva…now you gotta walk the talk.”I liked your style of writing humorous but with reasonable points…I am following you…if you get time you can visit mine”….

    1. Damn. Don’t call me a diva. Then I’d have to insist that the room I write in is painted all white and that only room temperature bottled water from the south of France is allowed to sit on my desk. And only people with two syllables in their first name are allowed to address me face-to-face.

      Too much drama. *grin*

  24. Agree! I try to reply to every comment. There are times when days or weeks later I’ve realized I missed a few, and I feel really bad. I get that if you’re Allie Brosh or The Bloggess or someone, you can’t reply to all your comments because that would take all day. But when I see bloggers with only a handful of comments and they don’t reply? I don’t get it. Sometimes I wonder if they think it’s cooler to not reply. Or they’re afraid people will think they’re “padding” their comment count. Or maybe they’re just lazy. I dunno. Nice post!

    1. Thanks!

      Someone needs to do a study. Because really? Not replying is a bit rude. And even with the big bloggers…quite a few of them feature clickable ads on their site. Share a few pennies with someone to comment reply for you. Then you’re practicing good blogging behavior AND helping the economy. Win/win.

  25. It may have something to do with the impersonal nature of the medium, but I believe either you understand why it’s important to answer, or you just don’t get it.
    I’m very new at this and I’m still trying to figure out the WordPress interface and notifications system. Because of this a few comments may have gone unanswered.
    But from day-one it was always my intention to reply to anyone who takes the time to read and comment on anything I post. After all, isn’t that why we put our stuff online, so others will read it?
    It’s simple, if someone speaks to you, you don’t just ignore them and walk away, you answer.
    I guess this was my long-winded way of saying: I agree with everything you wrote. :-)

    1. You may have cracked this nutshell with your first sentence. Getting “it” (comment replies) or not.

      Blogging doesn’t have to be impersonal. You can make it as personal as you want. Replying helps share a bit more of you than what they may have gotten from the post. No article should just be post deep.

  26. I just wanted to comment on this (had to scroll all the way down though). I am a blogger myself but never get more than a few visitors a day, let alone comments. I’m not complaining, but it seems to me that bloggers who do get comments regularly already have achieved more than they might be aware of: they are visible!
    I hope I get to answering a dozen comments or so a day. I can think of worse things to do.

    1. Getting some visibility is hard work. It’s about making connections. You blog, you read other blogs, you comment. If you can get a rapport going people will come over for a visit.

      The amount of comments on this post is extremely rare for me and I’ve been blogging for four years now. I’m sure I could up my readers (and possibly the comments but more readers does not translate into more comments) but I choose not to spend all my time online. There are blogs I like and I comment on them. Occasionally, I come across a new blogger or someone makes a suggestion about a blog that I might find interesting. I decided, for me, to limit who I read BECAUSE I like to take the time to comment.

      You are right, though. It can be frustrating when you’re written something you think it pretty darn good and it just sits there…waiting. When that happens to me I give myself some time to stop freaking out and move on to the next post.

      And that’s what’s great about blogging. There is always a next post. *grin*

      1. I’m with you – I also end up limiting who I read because I want to make sure I can do good posts justice with a thoughtful comment! I feel bad when I don’t have time to do this and can only like.

        1. It’s a balance to be selective and yet not limit yourself.

          Sometimes I think, “What great post did I miss today?” but then realize that if I spent all day looking for other blogs, I’d never read the ones I do follow and commenting on those blogs?

          I’d have to hire someone and I don’t have that kind of cash.

  27. Great advice! I’m a new blogger and I think I’ve been responding to all my comments but after reading your etiquette reminder, I’ll make absolutely sure I do.

  28. Not many comments to respond to, but the only one I let lag was when a man told me he was “sure I was a good father”. I didn’t know what to say to that (to correct or leave incorrect?) I’m more of a chick type of person.

    1. He was probably appealing to your “masculine” side. We’ve all got that, right? I mean…I know I burp occasionally. Does that qualify?

      He missed the first clue: “Jessica.” Hmm.

  29. When I was Freshly Pressed it was comment heaven, and I responded to all but one which was in somewhat confusing English. I now see i could probably have figured out the meaning and responded to that too. But I have noted on other FP’ed blogs that there are folks who just go around making short and fairly insignificant comments on all of them, clearly because commenting on other blogs is supposed to be good for their own traffic. It’s not conversation for them; it’s visibility. I’ve also found blogs that are completely made up of reblogged freshly pressed posts from other people. I’m not sure whether to think that rude or just plain unethical.

    1. I would call only missing one comment reply a big win for you. I hear you about the “wha-huh?” comments. You can tell pretty quickly when someone hasn’t actually read your post. In those cases, I take the higher ground and reply in kind. Technically, that’s still a reply. *grin*

      I agree that commenting is a way to increase traffic but if the comment isn’t on point, I won’t be driving by.

      If all a person’s blog is about is reblogging, hopefully the blogs they are showcasing are worth the effort. But a little of that goes a long way.

              1. ;) I appreciate that. I really do enjoy reading your blog. You definitely have a way with words and you’re funny too! I hope you enjoy the rest of your day.

  30. If you’re down here, that means you read this post and scrolled down to comment. And you’re going to leave a comment, right? *grin*

    Keep ‘em coming and I’ll be back after a short “I have to eat NOW” interruption in reply programming.

  31. I enjoyed this nice freshly pressed post!! , and agree that replying to those who take the time to comment on your blogs – is proper etiquette, I always try my best to reply to those who comment, or have taken the time to even read what I’ve typed. I’ll admit some days I’m shy, but I always do my best to make sure to comment, or answer a question or anything because it’s also what I signed up for- for being a blogger… a blog isn’t only about you and your wants, or goals it’s about reader satisfaction, making friends, and always being thankful for their time that they invested just by being on your blog.

    And of course!! Spasibo Blogdramedy for your post.

    Zaychishka

    1. I agree. It’s all part of the blogging experience. Sometimes we feel like we’re writing in isolation so it’s important to get out there and connect.

      And…dobro pozhalovat’

  32. Wonderful BD! Finally someone said it … and you’re obviously preachin’ to the choir. :) Thanks so much for addressing this important issue. Congrats on the FP – absolutely deserved. All the best, Terri

  33. A wholeheartedly agree. Unless the commenting person is clearly insane (you get them every now and then,) at least a “Thanks for taking the time stop by and to comment” is nice. I don’t get bent out of shape if one or two comments of mine go unanswered, but if I follow someone’s blog and I always comment and they can never be bothered to respond, to me that signifies that they don’t appreciate my readership much.
    It makes me want to stop reading. If someone can take time out of their day to comment, I can take time to thank them.

    1. Exactly! Well said. Blogging is at its best in a shared environment. You gotta give a little to get a little.

      I’ve felt the same way about some blogs when I find it’s a one-way street. Leaves one hungry for more.

    1. Good point! Well done you. Let me go make a wee change to the copy.

      Unless…hmm. Northern Europeans…

      No. I come from northern European stock and there’s nothing wrong with my behavior. (Hold your comment. *grin*)

  34. Agree completely. I try to reply to all of my comments even if the only thing I have to say is “thank you”. And if I’m being honest, I’m much more likely to return to a blog in which the writer replies to my comments. It feels more like I’m engaging with the writer.

    1. That seems to be a common thread throughout this discussion. The ability to connect and exchange ideas. Meet new people; share new thoughts.

      It’s an interesting discussion. Thanks for joining in.

  35. Yes! I’ve been a little frustrated with trying to spark connection and fellow writer magic with other bloggers to only never get a comment back. I know some of my followers’ comments are the very words that spark something new inside me to share with the world and I am so grateful for them in engaging with me in this huge world. Thank you for this post! Justine

    1. Replying to comments can be like setting a match to a string of firecrackers.

      Bang! Bang! And a blogging idea is born. It’s great fun.

      And you’re welcome. *smile*

  36. Very timely, that I read your post today. I recently wrote a post filled with meaningless prose and little, if any, explanation of what it was about. A reader commented “I love the convoluted plot that eventually leads precisely…nowhere.”

    This has to be one of my favorite comments ever and I told them so.
    Good post. I’m paying attention.

    1. *snort*

      Brilliant comment. Shows you they were reading. *grin*

      I think that’s just become one of my top ten comments…that I’ll use the next time I’m out blog commenting.

      Thanks!

  37. Well said…writing is very close to my heart. I’m new to blogging and I’ve posted a few on my new blog but I’ve not had any visits or comments yet :(
    In this age is ‘likes’ it’s hard to get comments.

    1. You do have to do some initial work to introduce yourself. Find your voice, keep blogging, get out there and comment and eventually something you write will capture someone’s attention long enough for them to take the time to comment.

      I agree. Likes make it too easy to fake communication.

  38. Agreed. I mean, the only reason to have comments is to have some sort of interaction with your readers. Doesn’t mean you have to reply to every single one, but there should be something there, and if you don’t want to, then why have comments?

    1. *taps her nose*

      You are so right! I forgot that you can turn off comments.

      Although why you’d want to do that I don’t know.

      We bloggers are not Ibiza. *grin*

    1. I’m glad you loved it.

      But I’m no Emily Post. I’ve been known to swear on occasion. And get just a tad sarcastic. Sometimes both IN THE SAME POST!

      *hangs head in shame*

  39. I agree with you. If we do not take the time out to respond and appreciate the reader for making the effort to read and then comment on the blog, then he or she shall not feel engaged.
    I read a lot of blogs myself and I leave comments, but I find only the fellow bloggers who know me on blogosphere or personally reply. I think not replying to a comment may mean losing out on connecting to one more person.
    I liked what you wrote.

    1. It is a bit of a strange world, this blogging planet. You can “meet” someone for the first time and almost hear a “click” as you connect via your comments. I do think it makes it easier if you are familiar with a blogger, and they with you. But how boring life if you don’t expand your circle. Even by one.

      Thanks for visiting and sharing!

  40. Let me start by saying…I was having a sort of “meh”, day before I read your post on Freshly Pressed. I need to remind myself to ‘freshly press’ my brain more often. (That sounds rather more painful that I intended.)

    I would like to apologize beforehand in regards to the length of this comment-on behalf of my evil twin-who often pressures me to write too much.

    Along with your lovely blog (and this wonderful post), you seem to have amazing readers. I read through many of the comments-along with your rather witty replies-and it was like walking into a coffee shop filled with people I could sit down and laugh with.

    Your space is utterly enchanting.

    I love your style and pithiness. (I don’t think the word pithy is used often enough.) I also completely agree with you. Engaging with the audience that you have is so very important. It is an amazing honor to have someone pick out what you have written and take the time to comment; it means that not only are you doing something right, but-at least I believe this-you have made this connection for a reason.

    Beyond this etiquette, there is a cosmic sort of thing happening here on WordPress. I have said this often, and I am without a doubt, completely confident that the interactions here have just as much impact on someone’s day, week, year, life-as anything we encounter out there IRL. I will not get into particulars here, but starting my blog, basically saved my life. So I know its true. I meet people sometimes that need whatever it is that I had said that day, because they tell me.

    Even if it’s just one person-I did something right, and it really meant something. I just wish I could reach more people. What at first started as a blog to find my lost voice, started me thinking I would like to publish my work, and write for a living-so what I do now, I hope will turn into that.

    Which brings me to the reason for my “meh” today; because I feel like I put so much into my blog, and I struggle with readers. I don’t feel like my input from who reads my blog, matches my output.

    I am one of those people that, I believe, has good blogging etiquette. Even if I cannot reply in the first 24 hours, reply to every single comment, I do. Even if someone follows me without comment, I hop on their blog and thank them.

    I realize, that my blog, is almost entirely poetry, with a historical twist-(although it is free verse)-and that might not be everyone’s bag (baby), and I have only had my blog since February…but it is difficult to see a lot of other poets with so many readers, and not be able to reach a wider audience.

    If you ever have the time to read my blog, I’d be honored by your visit-and by anything you might contribute or suggest.

    It was a pleasure to find you today, and I’ll be following you.

    Fair Journey,
    Holly

    1. Hi Holly,

      First off…comment win for the longest comment I’ve ever had on Blogdramedy. I think you deserve a cookie.

      No need to apologize about the length. I enjoy reading comments and you had a lot of feeling to share. Isn’t it nice WordPress doesn’t limit characters? Imagine if you tried to do this on Twitter. Talk about a failed whale.

      Thanks for your kind words about me and my readers. My readers rock. They are so totally solid. I met a new bunch today who stopped by this Freshly Pressed tree. They sound like keepers so, yes, I’ll keep them.

      Your comment about cosmic interactions. I think you’re on to something there. When I first started about four years ago now, I “met” up with a blogger through Twitter and I checked out his blog, he checked out mine. We’ve been best online friends ever since. I wait for him to comment and I do the same. We have a blast and now he blogs with me on The Nudge Wink Report. Through him I met up with other bloggers who have the same, or similar, “blogging muscles” as I do. And that led me to other bloggers…and so it goes. I haven’t kept up with all of them because some have fallen off the blog-wagon but I’ll aways remember them.

      I hear you about putting so much of yourself into a post. Blogdramedy is mainly a humor blog with the odd “they can’t all be funny” posts. I enjoy the challenge of writing something that makes me laugh as I reread what I’ve written. If it makes me snort, I hit “publish.” I can’t tell you how many times all I’ve heard after posting is a dull thud then the sounds of crickets. It takes it out of you. That’s where my inherited stubborn streak comes to my rescue.

      You got to let that stuff roll off your back. You blog for you, nobody else. Yes, you secretly want to come back to your laptop an hour later to see that little orange icon glowing. And getting comments, especially ones that “get you” are fabulous. I started out saying “if only one person comments, I’m going to embrace that comment and it will be enough.”

      That still holds true for me. But even then, I enjoy the act of writing in and of itself.

      I don’t know what to tell you about increasing your comments. There’s a lot written about this on WordPress and you should check that out. Doing a lot of legwork, getting out and reading new blogs (and commenting) are a few ways to increase traffic. But even that doesn’t promise more comments.

      You say your blog is more poetic in nature and you’ve only been blogging since February? In blog-terms, that’s not very long…coming up for five months. I’ve been at this for four (frustrating yet fabulous) years and what you see happening on this post today? This is as rare as me eating only half a bag of potato chips. Or having just one martini.

      Do you use other social media to promote your posts? Are you part of poet groups on Facebook and Google+, even Twitter has #poetry. Add your blog address to your email signature. Ask other poets to guest blog. Feature other bloggers on your site. Yes, you are sending your readers off to check out someone else but it’s a nice thing to do and you could get some doing it back at ya.

      Whoa. Long reply. Look what you did! *grin.

      1. LOL. Yes, I am sorry about that-I forgot to warn you that my wordiness is a visually transmitted disease. Thank you so much for the speedy reply (and the cookie).

        And….here comes more. *Facedesk* In light of the length of your previous reply, do NOT feel obligated to do that again. I seem to be suffering from a rather nasty, uncontrollable form of verbal diarrhea (otherwise known as “the classic overshare”). Who does this? For reals.

        My husband reminded me of “blogging for me”, the other day. Its a good reminder. It is a mantra I often must repeat to myself, so I don’t turn my blog into a stress-trigger (or Goddess forbid, work). You don’t know my history, but if you did, you would be nodding your head how not so good that is for me.

        I think because I want to do what I love for a living-and the last (almost five) months of my life here, blogging, have reaffirmed that the thing I want the most in my life that has never come to fruition-is exactly that…makes me sometimes wish for more readers for validation.

        That I deserve it. Happiness…and to write for a living, is that for me. Despite all of my new-found growth, I think I still question whether I am worthy of it. I question whether I am taking crazy pills, and have deluded myself into thinking it was actually possible.

        That’s not really a reader problem, that’s a very personal one. It’s a dance I’m familiar with, and one I still stumble through. I just need to keep my feet on the path, and not beat myself up so much.

        Letting go of things, is a big lesson. For me, for anyone. It’s one I write the most-and its something I need to be reminded of often. So thank you for reminding me.

        I am grateful for your thoughtfulness and suggestions.

        Blessed Be,

        Holly

  41. Congrats on being freshly pressed! Thank you for this post. I am relatively new to blogging, and I treasure each and every comment that I receive. I love responding to comments and having discussions with fellow bloggers. It’s such a thrill when someone has clearly connected with your post and took the time to let you know. When looking at followers, likes, and comments, I feel like my true measure of blogging success is my comments. I’d rather have a small number of followers and thoughtful commenters than a large number of silent readers. Comments are what keep me going!

    1. Thank you! It’s been an interesting day. *grin*

      Girl, you got the right idea. Sometimes the best gifts come in small packages. Take good care of them and blog on!

  42. I always reply to people who take the time to comment on my blog. There have only been a handful of sensitive blog posts I have done where I haven’t felt mentally able to reply to all of the comments. I hope my commenters understood at that time. this is a great reminder of good blog etiquette and more bloggers should get back in touch with their readers!

    1. If your readers are regular readers, they’ll totally get that you sometimes need to look inwards and not out.

      Staying connected to your readers? It’s like eating an entire box of chocolate and not putting on a single pound.

      Wow. If someone could get on that, I’d blog about it. No, I would PAY someone to let me blog about it. *grin*

      Happy blogging!

  43. You’ve offered excellent advice in this piece. Too many people become discouraged about blogging because they feel they have to compose that “perfect” article each time they write a post. Their blogs suffer not from poor writing but from a lack of productivity. Congrats on being Freshly Pressed!

    1. Well thank you for your positive reinforcement comment. *grin*

      Perfectionism has broken the backs of more bloggers than any piece of straw on a camel’s back. We have to approach blogging like we’d approach a mechanical bull.

      Hitch up your pants, toss down that drink, get up on that beast. A hardy “Yee-haw!” doesn’t hurt, either.

  44. Great thoughts about commenting. I sometimes think that people don’t comment because they think they need to sound clever, original, or brilliant. Or they only use that dang “like” button instead of typing a comment. Maybe it should be burned….

    1. What they need to be is authentic.
      A comment doesn’t need to be clever as long as it’s real.

      Can we turn off the “like” button? This goes to the top of my research list for tomorrow.

      Thanks!

  45. I don’t know about you but it’s past my bedtime and I need my “moderately attractive in a soft light” sleep.

    Feel free to keep commenting and I’ll get myself ‘spressoed up in the morning to respond to any comments you’d like to leave overnight.

    What a bunch of night owls.

    Don’t hoot-hoot too loud.

  46. Man, the only reason I write posts anymore is for the opportunity to banter with my commenters. I’m ever so lonely. But that’s besides the point. You are bloody write. Right, even. Make that damned effort. (And how could one even consider it an effort? why are friends seemingly in such abundance? where are these people?)

    You’ve just gotta pretend that the comment is a smile someone is throwing at you. Then you gotta ask yourself, ‘Am I the sort of person to turn a snooty nose up to a friendly stranger’s fleeting hello, or am I the sort of person to meet that smile with a smile of my own, or maybe a chuckle, or maybe even a creepy-arse I-wanna-sex-you-and-your-dreams grin?’ The latter of the latter is obviously the only noble option, but that’s, alas, an impossibility in the cyber world. Kudos. Kudos!

    1. *finger on nose*

      You got it in one. Well, not ONE. More like a whole lotta words. And very good words they are, too.

      I like your approach to commenting and replying but I draw the line at sex. I’ll go as far as heavy petting but that’s it.

    1. She was! It’s very nice. Blogdramedy is pleased with the response and has really enjoyed the back and forth with readers.

      She says thank you for your comment and the chance to speak in the third person. *grin*

  47. Thanks for posting this – not only was it a great read but your original post and the comments have been like a 101 in blog etiquette for a complete newbie like me only 3 posts into this blogging thing. So much to learn – but so much fun too.

    1. Wow. Another innocent has succumbed to the lure of blogging. You’re going to have a blast!

      Welcome and thanks for commenting. You’ll be doing this a lot, it’s great fun, but invest in a good martini shaker. Or whatever gives you a happy. *grin*

  48. Ok, I’m not a Sex and the City fan, but I love that “pull over” line that you mention and how you incorporated here on this post. I agree with you for the most part about responding to comments, and I am definitely comment-friendly but not on a consistent basis. I do my best though, and find some comments are difficult to respond to, like those one-word comments, or super generous comments that leave you speechless.

    I love comments and enjoy responding to them and feel guilty when my response is so late. Sometimes I feel it’s too late to respond. Do you think there’s a cut-off time for responding?

    Great post.

    1. Not a Sex in the City fan? *screeches to a halt*

      Now you got my attention! There were so many things about that show I loved and so many things that irritated me. I did love the writing. Good writing is very big with me.

      You are right. Sometimes with one word comments there’s not much to work with when it comes to making a reply. I do the best I can while resisting the urge to ask them…”just the one word, huh?”

      And timing for responding? It’s never too late. The person you’re responding to might never see it but YOU know. So, yeah, a reply whenever is mucho importante.

  49. Whoa, my scrolling finger just got RSI! But the comments (and replies!) have been fascinating reading. I reply to each and every comment. I might leave it until a few have built up, but it’s not just the etiquette for me it’s because it’s the most enjoyable part of blogging. And because sometimes, often, the comments are funnier than the original post. They almost always raise a smile and I want to say thank you to readers for that.
    Congratulations on the FP, it’s how I found you.

    1. Hey, hi. Thanks!

      But put some ice on that finger. I wish it was later in the day here and I could offer you a martini!

      You are so right…sometimes the comments ARE funnier. That happens to me all the time. *quirks eyebrow*

  50. I’m with Carrie’s take. It would be bad manners not to take the time to acknowledge that someone ELSE took the time to “like” or thoughtfully comment, whether I like it or not, on my work. It certainly helps to have a small audience, but HEY! If you can’t hang with the flood of comments, post less often.

    Nice post, and congrats on your FP. (And no need to reply either.)

  51. Thank you!! I don’t know how many times I have read a truly engaging piece on FP only to notice when I scroll the comments, the author hasn’t said a word to any of them. I know the sudden rush of people that have all differing opinions can be overwhelming, but c’mon a few comments here and there is not going to hurt. Congrts on being FP’d and putting this out there. :)

    1. And that’s why this post happened. I was doing just what you described when that voice in my head started muttering. And then the volume increased until I had to stop everything and pay attention. We are such a verbal lot, bloggers. Kind of shocked me how many don’t take the time to chat.

      Thanks for stopping by. Blog on!

  52. You don’t have to reply to this comment…you probably have writers cramp by now, or need to use the bathroom. I just wanted to say, as a person struggling through setting up a new blog, (first post yesterday, complete with a vanilla theme). I am so glad that I found this post and your blog right away. I have a lot to learn, and you are my fairy godmother of the blog world. I will be back before midnight.

    1. Right. Done with the bathroom. Thanks for giving me a hall pass.

      You had your first post yesterday? Congratulations! Did you celebrate…or are you sitting there agonizing over every word? *grin*

      I’m happy you think of me as someone slightly plump with sparkly wings who flits around swatting people with her wand. How did you know that’s always been my dream job?

      Hope you enjoy your travels on the blogging highway. You’ll soon be hooked.

  53. Thanks for this reminder. I agree (almost) whole-heartedly with what you’ve said, my only hesitation being a worry that I already dominate my own blog (duh…), so if I reply to every comment then it can come off as dominating the comments section as well, which, at base, is where my (loyal & devoted, of course!) readers get to shine. That said, I am passionate about the blog as a conversation/thinking-out-loud piece among friends, and if I’m not joining in, I am short-changing those friends, yes? So my worry may be misplaced, I dunno…What I am tending to do to limit my own comments is reply to several comments at once, so that every other comment in my comments section isn’t from me. A solution in search of a problem, ya think?

    1. Each blogger has their own approach to handling comments. I fall on the side of responding as much as possible because, for me, I love the interaction.

      I would never think someone was dominating their comment section just by responding. I’d think that was cool. There are times when you don’t respond…when readers are having their own cross comment conversation, for example. That would be rude. *grin*

      Thanks for sharing and commenting.

  54. A nice push for a bloggers like me !! Hope there are a few out there, who love to blog , find it an excellent medium for expressing their ideas and views, but get shaky and feel lost when they are see a comment – thinking of the best way to respond..:)

    1. That’s me…Miss Pushy. I should get a button made.

      The best way to respond is just to write something right now…and then edit it later.

      “Write drunk; edit sober” is something that works really well for me. *grin*

  55. You just guilted me into checking my archive and then spending the next hour replying to comments. Just because I’ve been in a funk doesn’t mean I need to neglect my readers.

  56. Great post and so right! Blogging is a two-way street. We all do it to share our views and thoughts and to gain a respense otherwise we would hand-write in a diary! Is it too much to expect a response for reading and commenting?/

  57. Great post and I totally agree. I have just started blogging in the last few days and the comments are what I am looking forward to most. As my blog is music related I am hoping it opens up more bands and artists for me to explore. These I can then blog about and introduce them to people as well. This is where the excitement lies for me which is why your post makes so much sense from my point of view.

    1. Hi there. Thanks for commenting.
      A newbie blogger…exciting times ahead. Enjoy!

      A music themed blog is a great idea. I’ll stop by for a “listen.” *grin*

  58. I will do my best to connect with my fellows readers, reply to my commenters, and establish a friendly connection with them all!

  59. I haven’t been blogging for long so I haven’t been receiving too many or any comments but I will definitely.do this if I ever get anything. I work in communications, and every comment we get or reply on Twitter, I do my best to respond. It makes it more fun that way…puts the social in.social media.

  60. I have seen this happen particularly for popular blogs (not necessarily Freshly Pressed ones), where the comments number into the hundreds.

    I wrote a post where I wondered aloud at what I would do if I ever got, say 97 comments to a post I’d written, since it would be a marked change from the one or two I usually get, which frankly take no time at all to reply to.

    But because those bloggers don’t take the time to reply, I don’t bother to comment since I’d only be adding to the unnoticed detritus below the post anyway.

    1. It’s a strange phenomenon in the blogging world. I don’t have an answer as to why it happens but it did set of my peeved meter. *grin*

      How sad to think of comments as detritus. Poor lonely comments.

      1. Wow that was quick, but I can’t say that it was unexpected lol.
        Unfortunately you made me realize that I did make a comment on two recently FP’d posts and I haven’t received a reply. I guess they don’t read as quickly as you do.

      1. Its something you have dealt with some unsaid wish of every novice like me and truely I would be looking forward to put my eyes on beautiful blogs like this in near future too. Keep us updated

  61. Thank you for this post. I’m just getting started; I haven’t been sure how much I should reply to comments. I don’t want to seem oily and begging for attention. Thanks for the encouragement.

    1. New blogger meat. How delish.

      Replying to comments is never oily unless that’s what you intend. I like it when someone tips you the hat and says, “I saw what you wrote” and doesn’t leave you alone, hanging on a comment thread.

  62. I would venture that this posting of yours has more comments on it than any other, amirite? :-)

    It’s an interesting point you make. So many times I come across a new blog, find it’s content very interesting, hit follow and admire it from afar (and in silence). Sometimes, the post itself captures so much, I feel there is little left to say.

    I will make it a point to practice better blogging etiquette and reply to the posts that I find valuable.

    And I am starting with you!

    1. If not, it’s pretty close. It’s been a wild ride.

      Interesting point about reading a post and finding there isn’t more to be said. In those cases, a “like” is comment enough. For me, I find that a comment forms naturally while reading and I enjoy adding to the conversation.

      I hope you do get out there and comment more. It could enhance your blogging experience!

      Thanks for visiting and sharing.

    1. Interesting that new bloggers are picking up on this. Maybe that’s why it’s taken me so long to write a post about this topic.

      I’m jaded. *squints eyes shut*

      Glad you like the blog. It’s appreciated.

  63. Great post..I agree with you wholeheartedly.. Replying to comments is one of very favorite things to do..

    I would like to take it a step further, and say that it would be lovely if fellow bloggers would either leave a comment or tap the “like” icon when visiting, and reading a post from a fellow blogger…

    I would be so happy to reply to a comment, if a comment was there waiting… The hits versus comments count is always a bit bewildering to me.. When I visit blog sites, I always try to leave a comment, or at the very least, tap “like” to let them know I was visiting.

    Lovely blog and great post..

    1. It is a very enjoyable experience. As I said in the post, there’s more to be discovered if you take the opportunity to explore the world of the comment conversation.

      About those hits…I try to stay away from my stats page as I find it bewildering sometimes that so many people view blogs but that’s not reflected in your comments. But I’ve learned that many people click follow and then they never come back.

      In my case, it’s because they’ve discovered that I’m not who they thought I was. And I’m okay with that. *grin*

      Thanks for the nice words!

  64. This was just about the only thing I was sure of when I started blogging last year. Reply. To. Each. Comment. Period. I am so glad you brought up this point. I have often felt unwelcome or like an extra crew member when bloggers don’t reply to my comments. It has resulted in either of the two: I don’t comment there much anymore or I unfollow them. By the way your freshly pressed post left me totally satisfied:). Well done!

    1. I’m glad I appeased your hunger. Replying to comments is the best part of my blogging day. We should all get out and exercise our right to reply.

      I feel like making a placard and marching. *smile*

  65. I agree with derekthezenchef, who said that the response should be at least as in depth as the comment. This would seem to be common courtesy. That said, there are those who blog for the conversation after the post, and those who just want to their post to speak for itself. Let’s not pressure everyone to do it one way or the other. We’re all here by choice and there’s no one right way.

    1. You are correct. We blog by choice. For any number of reasons.

      But for me, not replying or acknowledging a comment that someone has taken the time to write is not the type of blogger I want to be.

      If you’re not interested in exchanging thoughts with your readers on what you’re written, there is a choice to turn off comments.

      That’s one button I choose not to push.

      1. I agree for the most part. I love getting comments and I respond to every one. If the average blogger doesn’t want to respond to comments, they probably ought to turn off comments.

        But I know of one blogger who will never let a thread end unless the commenter ends it (by not responding). It’s well intended, and this blogger clearly enjoys the conversation, but I have no idea how he has the time to continue so many conversations for so long (he’s got A LOT of very engaged commenters). Another blogger I know does the opposite, He has an academic blog that he uses to generate discussion, and he does not participate in this discussion consistently, unless as a moderator of civility. These two bloggers seem to represent the extremes, and they both seem to have found styles that work for them. So I think what I’m saying is, let’s leave room for style.

  66. Great post. I follow a professional blog with fantastic content (the author if very eloquent0, but he rarely responds to comments and therefore, there are very few of them. I think the difference between an average blog and an awesome blog can be how well you reply to your commentors and show that you’re listening and receptive to their points of view – at least that’s what I try to do on my WordPress blog (Skeptifit.com) which is an exercise/fitness based blog (feel free to visit! :p). Though I admittedly probably don’t post nearly as often as I should.

    1. Everyone has a different approach to their blogging. I enjoy replying to comments as much as I enjoy writing. I choose not to write in isolation but that doesn’t work for everyone.

      Still…if someone comments, you reply. Must be my British upbringing… *grin*

      1. It’s half the fun really! I only wish I had more commentors on my own blog – I try to use as many strategies as possible to get people involved, fingers crossed for getting ‘Freshly Pressed’ though.

    1. Thank you.

      Spam? Surprisingly, no. But this post hasn’t filtered throughout the system yet so by this time next week? I could be swimming in spam. How’s that for a visual?

    1. Maybe because it’s not face-to-face? Because it is hard to ignore a person standing right in front of you.

      I a have little plastic human-shaped figurine that I keep in front of my laptop to remind me that bloggers and readers are real people.

      Kidding. I don’t have a figurine. I have a martini glass but it works just the same. *grin*

      1. Yes, not being face-to-face is the same factor that allows us not only to be merely impolite in not responding, but to be out and out rude and vicious in Comment sections, as so much Internet flaming is. (I’m thinking of Yahoo news story comments here, whoa!) It’s helpful for me to think of blogging as a conversation with my readers, and if they were sitting across the table responding to something I just said, would I just remain silent and gaze off into the distance?

  67. This is a really great post, and a good reminder to those out there who sometimes forget to reply.

    I always reply to my comments, but I can’t be too proud of myself, since I am so new to the blogging world – I get SUPER excited every time I get one and can’t wait to reply to them.

    G xx

    1. Isn’t it exciting? Blogging is great fun and I hope you have a wonderful experience as you journey down this writing road.

      Readers rock so good to hear you’re excited to hear from them. Thanks for commenting!

  68. I find myself getting caught reading all the comments for longer than it takes me to finish the original articles. But as one comment I read mentioned one word responses and short phrases, I too struggle with them. But still I try my best. I’m glad you wrote this, I hope the message spreads! It reminds me of this statistic I heard about teenagers never changing the toilet paper roll once it’s finished and ever since I’ve made it a life long goal to replace every toilet paper roll I encounter with a new one. Even so, I’d rather my comments be genuine which is rarely possible if I’m not affected by the piece. So I’m torn, but having read this I will probably feel the urge to comment on every post I read from here on out. So thanks! My fingers will be sore soon enough

    1. Hi there. Thanks for taking the time to share.

      I was coming more from the viewpoint of the blogger who does not reply to any comments. I think it’s rude to ignore your readers.

      Now when it comes to posting a comment on another blog…that is totally up to the reader. If the post doesn’t sing to you, why sing back? A writer can’t connect with readers in every post. If that was the case, we’d all be getting our work published and retiring to the Tropics.

      When something resonates, leave a comment. Please leave a comment. If something is well written enough to give you the urge to drop the blogger a line, that blogger would love to know about it. Unless they don’t reply to comments which brings us full circle and I’ll stop now. *grin*

      1. Haha I think I get the picture, thank you for the comment back. And the full circle and the general sense of compassion I feel now. Keep em comin! Hopefully it’ll change at least a few habits

  69. I can’t agree more on stripping ourselves off the cloak of perfectionism. My blog is 45 days old and starting it has been a good practice and motivation for me to just write and hit Publish! And I make sure I respond to comments the best I can :) I think it’s courtesy

    1. Morning youngster! Hope you have cake today for the 45th day. Save a slice for the rest of us.

      Good luck with blogging…hope you come to love it as many of us do. *smile*

          1. Haha, you’re cute too. I am using my iPhone and there’s this app called Emoji that gives you all sorts of cute emoticons. I am glad you can see it on your screen, sometimes they don’t show up properly.

  70. I always make sure I reply to every single comment I get, to the extent that I went on my spam comments and replied back to some but that wasn’t a very good idea. Great advice though! :)

    1. Hey, thanks for stopping by.

      Tell me you didn’t. Fanning the spam is never a good thing. Better invest in a shovel ’cause you’re going to be knee deep. *grin*

  71. I’m working on it! People do forget to “socialize” with each other in the blog world and I’m no exception. I’m a smalltime blogger who is always thrilled when someone reads my blog, much less comments in it. This gentle reminder also motivates me to participate more with the people that have been there with me from the beginning. ;)

  72. Enjoyed reading your blog. Ended up reading comments and your replies too! I just got back to blogging and published my first post on a new blog at inkblotsandcoffeestains. I’ll keep the blog etiquette in mind. I got a couple of follows but no comments yet.

  73. I’m so glad I saw your post! I was beginning to think I’d completely misunderstood the community part of blogging! I just started to set up a blog and curiously wandered around enjoying other blogs and commenting on some. Not much fun when comments fall into dead space in some eWorld and you know no human ever read them! Love your blog, your humor and your commitment to answer!

    1. Glad you found me. With a little effort on all our parts, we can help bring the community back to communication.

      No one likes to hear this sound when they bang out a comment:

  74. You’re so right! If somebody has made the effort to write a comment on your blog, whether it’s good or bad, of course you should reply. That’s what they’re there for.
    Nicely said and I absolutely love the Sex and the City reference by the way! :)

    1. Common courtesy could change the world we live in today. If we all put on our common sense hats…whether we look good in hats or not.

      It’s time for Sex and the City to make a comeback. You heard it here first.

  75. Reblogged this on Momager 101 and commented:
    Great for anyone inside or outside the blogging world. It’s time to start reengaging with the world and SPEAK!!! :)

  76. I’m so glad this got Freshly Pressed so that lots of people can see it! I find it so rude if I comment and don’t get a reply, you feel like you’ve spoken to someone and they’ve just ignored you! I don’t expect an instant reply, but a reply at some point is only polite. If I comment on someone’s blog a couple of times and don’t get a reply, then I won’t bother after that. I’ve seen some bloggers put a note on their blog saying that they don’t always reply to comments, so fair enough, people know that ahead of time and can decide whether to comment or not, but otherwise, no excuse really! They could close the post to comments if they haven’t got time to reply.

    1. All very good points and the reason why I wrote the post. I was getting a little peeved and while I’m pretty easygoing I couldn’t let it slide past without pulling a Madonna.

      Thanks for stopping by and expressing yourself. *grin*

      As you say, even a comment saying you’re comment-lite with the comments is a form of communication.

  77. Sometimes I used to ignore some comments on my blog just because I didn’t have anything more interesting to say than “thank you.” But then whenever one of my comments on another blog went went unanswered, that would kind of annoy me. So, even when all I have to say is “thank you/thanks a lot/I appreciate the compliment”, I respond anyways-I don’t want my readers to feel like I’m giving them the cold shoulder.

    1. It can be a challenge sometimes to find new ways to say thank you. It’s a good exercise though to dip into your word pool and put a twist of the usual. I follow the philosophy of “Straight up? Or with a twist?”

      Thanks for stopping by and not giving us a shoulder of chilly. *grin*

  78. I agree. Especially when a reader asks a question and the writer never answers. It’s like when you are having a conversation with someone and you say something but they just keep going on talking over you like they didn’t hear you. Annoying and potentially awkward.

    1. Some people like the sound of their own voice over others. I guess it doesn’t cross their mind that sometimes we like the sound of their voice, too.

      Reminds me of the “low-talkers” episode on Seinfeld. I wish some bloggers would speak a little louder. *grin*

  79. I completely agree! When there are no comments I feel like I might as well be writing in my diary like a 15 year-old girl just talking to herself! I like this very much.

  80. I didn’t realize I was making this blogging mistake! You’re right – acknowledging comments is important, because an individual took the time to make the comment in the first place.

    Great post!
    ~Dulcinea

    1. I am so resisting the urge to break into song or offer you a ride on my donkey.

      Love your name.

      And yes, it’s important. I’d go so far as to say it’s critical to the blogging experience.

  81. I know someone who has the following message above her comment box:

    ‘Although I may not always answer, I love to hear your comments. I will answer if I feel I have something to say. :)

    Kinda cocky, I think!

  82. I love that you have 349 (now 350!) comments on your comments post re comments!
    I’m very new to blogging and surprised to hear that writers don’t always reply to comments – what’s it all for if you aren’t going to interact with your readers? I’m about to go live and hope that I garner some followers – don’t take for granted your audience folks, be thankful you have people who read your work so take good care of them! :)

    1. Hang on. Hang on. I have to check the math. Let me break out my abacas.

      *click-click-click*

      Okay. About half are comments from readers. The other half is all me. And this is what my keyboard looks like now:

      Great shout-out to your future readers…who hopefully will become participating commenters. Thanks for swinging by.

  83. I agree. :) I love responding to comments … seeing the little orange conv bubble up top makes my day!
    Same goes for Facebook too… the hubby always makes fun of me when I thank every single person with a message when they greet me on my birthday. “If it wasn’t for FB, they wouldn’t have remembered!” he’d say. Yup – but I appreciate that they took a second out of their day to type out “HBD” :)

    1. How would we survive without the orange convo bubble? It’s blogging at its best. *grin*

      In this day of social media, the birthday card seems to have fallen by the blogging highway wayside. But it’s nice there’s something to replace a card greeting.

      I don’t do Facebook much so if I miss your next birthday…HBD!

      Thanks for adding your thoughts to this conversation. *smile*

    1. That sound I”m hearing.
      It’s the sound of the other shoe dropping.

      Glad I was here to save you from the unforgivable offense of silent commenting. Reply to your readers and make someone’s day. *grin*

  84. It’s my intention to reply to every comment on my blog, but I have a 20-blog list in my inbox of ones I haven’t had a chance to reply to. I love engaging through comments. When I don’t, I feel I’m missing out on the full community experience I crave. I also have a hard time coming back to blogs where folks routinely fail to engage at all.

    And yet, the truth is that I (a) have no more than one hour to myself any given day (with one hour being the very good days!), and (b) have to be patient with myself, recognizing there’s a reason my intention is only probably one-quarter fulfilled. I get excited when I do have a post that’s 100% replied-to. :)

    1. We humans crave satisfaction in one form or another. As writers, we bloggers are a verbal lot. It’s polite to shut up sometimes and let the others speak. And it’s even more polite to respond.

      Thanks for stopping by. I’m sure you use that one hour a day and work it hard. *smile*

  85. Now this is one topic I sure would love to comment on.

    Why?

    Because this doesn’t only hold water here in blogging. It even holds true to your FB, or IG. Particularly FB, when there are higher chances of online engagement with your readers vs. other platforms. Or perhaps because I use FB more often than IG hehe…

    Nonetheless, I agree that comments made to an article deserve an equal response, be it a simple “nice” or an emoticon.

    But for the sake of argument – good blogging etiquette, here’s my two cents worth. I personally write (and get into blogging), not because I wanted to gain tons of comments for what I write. My ultimate goal is to translate my thoughts into words that are both comprehensible and amusing (not boring). Which to me is a genuine feat all the time, especially if you are not an experienced writer to begin with. And that is one challenge I would happily engage in, simply because at times I am lured into writing :).

    Now if comments this lengthy is made on your blog, that is when I would say, it is certainly a good blogging etiquette for the writer to at least respond to this, because I have taken so much brain power and neurons to come up with this, and let you know I like it ;) the expression not just merely encapsulated in a single word “nice..” but a comment with perspective..and an emoticon to match it lol!

    Wait..is this a comment? or another blog?

    Whatever…haha…I enjoyed it, cheers! ;)…

    1. It’s not the vehicle your words go out on, it’s the way you drive it that matters. Set the destination, check the route, drive safely, respect the other drivers on the road…and when you arrive (when you hit publish) sit back and share the wonders of the trip with your readers. This is such a flowery statement but I think you get the drift.

      Doesn’t matter what type of blog your write…serious, humorous, political, poetic, animal/mineral/vegetable…we all need to check our rearview mirrors.

      Thanks for sharing your post-length reply. *grin*

      Cheers.

  86. I really enjoyed this article and as I am fairly new to blogging (I started 2 years ago but only recently started actively pursing it) this is something I’m glad I’m learning sooner rather than later because yes, politeness goes a long way!

  87. I am new to blogging and I can’t wait until I have a good base of followers and I get into the habit of blogging more often. This is a very good tip and I plan on keeping this in mind during by journey into the social media pool!

    1. I think you’re talking about not getting any comments on your blog? Most of this conversation has been about us bloggers not replying to comments they get from their readers.

      If you’re struggling, check out The Daily Post on WordPress for some helpful hints. It takes time and it takes reaching out to other bloggers who write on similar subject or just those you enjoy reading. Spread the word by social media and don’t be shy: ask your friends and family to stop by for a visit.

      It can be frustrating but don’t give up. Ultimately you blog for yourself. No one else. If you get comments, think of that as the bonus round. *smile*

      1. Correct, you are. I always have time to respond to the one comment a day that I get and I’m always so happy someone stopped by. I’ll check out The Daily Post, thanks!

  88. Sometimes, it takes me a few days to reply to comments on my blog and I feel guilty about that. I think most blog commentators are reasonable enough to understand that may have a busy schedule but I just can’t shake that feeling that it’s no good to leave comments hanging. It feels like walking away in the middle of a conversation. I always thought that is was because I’m such a weirdo but when I think about what you wrote, I agree. It IS only good etiquette, though it’s understandable enough that a good blogger will have a lapse or two from time to time.

    1. We are not perfect. And how boring if we were!

      Living busy lives we can’t always get to our blogs and delays happens. Life happens. That’s why I think it’s important we take the time, whenever that time is, to keep up with our readers and drop them a note to say “hi and thanks for reading.”

      Let’s reach out and touch somebody. With our hands on the table at all times. *grin*

  89. Great, u changed my mind. But this should really be put in works by those Fashionistas and many pop viral persons who are getting so self centered. ;)

  90. This really helps a been blogger like myself, I have no clue what to do but write, worry about grammar, and copyright citations. Lol. As a writer, we sometimes allow what is truly important to drift away from us. What is writing, without readers, and that curious relationship that seems to… bloom?
    I’d love to read more encouraging pieces like this, and please follow and read my simple narrative blog. Faithingyourfears.WordPress. (: would really appreciate some creative feedback! Keep up the good work!!

    1. Hi there,

      Love the analogy of ours writing experiences as a form of gardening. It’s hard work. It takes perseverance. You have to seed, and water, and fertilize. You need to weed (by way of editing) and when things start to grown, you need to appreciate what you’ve planted and say thank you when people stop by to sniff your roses. *smile*

      Thanks for sharing.

  91. My thing is I love to write but I tend to never get comments! If I did I would love to interact with my readers it’s all about the blogging process! I want people to know that I am open to all questions and comments! It makes you a better writer and a better blogger!

    1. Hi and thanks for stopping by. I hear you about the lack of comments. It’s a challenge with so many blogs out there to get some attention. Find your voice, keep at it, and look for other bloggers who have similar sensibilities. WordPress (The Daily Post) has a variety of helpful hints and tips for increasing readership. It’s a good resource for all bloggers.

      Blog on!

      1. Thank you for responding to my comment @blogdramedy! I feel so important because you responded lol! Thanks for the advice I will check out the Daily Post thanks for the tip!

  92. This has just reminded me to go and do some comment replies, hopefully as pithy as Carrie Bradshaw. You’re right; there’s an etiquette and we should following it! But I do have one inane serial commenter – do the same rules apply?!

    1. Love pithy! Writing different characters is a great way to exercise your writing muscles. Sometimes I write pretend interviews as a way to write in different voices. Good for the mental vocal cords.

      Replying to comments is just another form of communication. This time directly with your readers. We should never pass up the opportunity to exchange thoughts and opinions.

      As for your serial commenter…are they offensive or just persistent, trying to get your attention? Or worse, they’re trolling you? I find if you can keep your response on the humorous side, it can nip things in the bud. Also, don’t ask leading question. Keep it short and sweet then move on. Oh, and thank you for your comment. *smile*

  93. I think a lot of it, from a writer’s perspective, is that when you write about contentious, personal stuff like religion and feminism (like I do), the vitriol people unleash anonymously can be so mean-spirited and overwhelming that it can make us never want to write again. I had to apply a “never ever read the comments–ever” rule to a Salon piece I did almost a year ago because people were so insanely, personally mean. I was threatened (really, people were emailing me with insults and threats of physical violence) and ridiculed for a project I did which was only designed to change myself, not change the world. I eventually understood that people were misinterpreting my goals (and even if they weren’t, people acting like asses isn’t an acceptable reason to stop trying to start discussions), but it took me eight months to even attempt to write in a public forum ever again.

    I think it’s awesome, though, that a lot of people DO actually want to have productive discussions, and that they have the manners to have them kindly in public spaces. I think dialogue is sorely needed, and I applaud the folks who are courageous enough to have them. Rock on! :)

    1. Ah, free speech. It’s a wonderful thing. Too bad it doesn’t come with a manual on good manners because some people could use a good primer.

      Sounds like you pushed a few buttons with your article. I think when that happens, it sometimes comes from guilt. The person making rude, nasty comments knows deep inside there’s some truth about what you’ve written that they are’t capable of understanding. Usually through fear of change or a threat to their understanding of the world. If it’s deeply ingrained nothing you say is going to make a difference. In those cases, I usually exercise my sarcasm muscle (disguised as humor) make a brief reply then move on.

      Again, though, it comes down to good manners.

      I wrote a piece once on gun control (for) and most of the comments were positive. The ones that weren’t were from people full of fear that I was coming to take their guns away, damned if they were going to let the government do that, spitting vitriol about oppression, etc. etc. I knew any reply from me that didn’t support their comment was a waste of good words. If they had their facts wrong, I said so then said thank you and moved on.

      Turns out I didn’t have to do much of that as the other readers stepped up and supported my piece. That doesn’t always happen.

      Thanks for sharing and…blog on!

  94. I personally feel that people have that inclination and zeal for write-ups that are simple and comes straight from the heart. People appreciate innocent and clarity in the same time. I enjoy being a reader more :) Well thanks for sharing this, Glad reading.

    1. Nothing wrong with simple. Sometimes keeping it simple is the best approach to take to writing.

      I, too, enjoy being a reader. I really, really enjoy it when I come up with just the right comment. Bliss.

      Thanks for stopping by. *smile*

  95. Wow! I was not only glued to the post but also to the series of comments that followed (eyes paining, me smiling)… You are really the queen bee aren’t you? I am sort of new here and dont get too many comments yet but its always amazing when the icon is orange..umm.. specially because I am new.. (Shh! you had all my attention with “Sex and the city” )…

    1. Hope you don’t strain your eyes. *grin*

      As for being a queen bee…I wish. Because then I’d be surrounded by sexy worker bees.

      Thanks for commenting. Hope you enjoy your blogging experience. It can be great fun.

      1. Send over some of the sexy worker bees… can be quite inspirational and will be a good retreat for the eyes .. *wink*…

        Looking forward to enjoying the experience, though your posts are one of the biggest source of fun for me and many others I am sure..

  96. Great post! I always get a bit miffed when I comment on a post in hopes to get some form of discussion coming back from the blogger or other commenters and nothing comes back. I think discussion is really what blogging is about. It’s not just about delivering information or telling a great story. Blogging truly is a tool in which you can interact with writers all over the world.

    1. Thanks. I agree. Blogging can be a journal or it can be an interactive experience. It’s a choice. If you want to only deliver an opinion or information, post a note saying so. We may still leave a comment but we’ll know going in that you won’t be participating. Fair enough.

      Thanks for swinging by. *smile*

  97. I’ve heard both sides from experienced bloggers – those who respond to all comments and those who respond only when they feel they have something further to say. I’m with you on this one. Not responding to a comment is akin to not replying to someone who wishes you “good morning”…it leaves them cold! Thanks for visiting and following my blog. I am browsing through yours and enjoying what I read!

    1. As they say, there’s always two sides to a story. For me, I like my stories to include audience participation. If you comment on one of my posts, you will always get a response. It’s the polite way to blog.

      Thanks for visiting and snooping around. Hope you enjoy!

  98. Amen, I was thinking the same thing not too recently. It is such an honor to receive a like, let alone a comment, that I often fall over myself in response! This needed to be said! Take a bow!

    1. Looks like it’s a majority opinion that replying to comments is good blogging manners. It’s something that’s been bothering me and it’s refreshing to find I’m not the only one. As I’ve mentioned in other replies on this post, if you choose not to comment, for whatever reason, take a moment to explain why. That’s cool.

      I’m a big believer in acknowledging readers when they respond to something I’ve written. Beside, it’s usually quite fun.

      Thanks for taking the time to comment. It’s appreciated.

  99. I admit, I was found guilty of this crime less than an hour ago!! A friend who has been following my blog from day one sent me a Facebook message, “did you see my comment on your post?” I responded, “I’m not sure, I’ve been busy this afternoon and evening, when did you post it?” Her response kicked me in the head, “12 hours ago!! I know you’ve been on your blog since then!” It is hard with our hurried world to take time out some days for what truly matters, people, friendships, relationships. We all have more in common than we realize, if only we could make the time to find out.

    1. So true. We lead increasingly busy lives and it is hard sometimes to find the time (and energy) to pay attention to everything going on. We blog for many reasons, one is to connect with people. Nice to see your friend didn’t have a problem calling you on not looking at your comments. Makes me wonder what her comment was… *grin*

  100. I totally agree! There are so many awesome bloggers that I used to read. But, after multiple comments and not one response, I felt like my readership wasn’t appreciated. So, I stopped reading. I’m so glad you posted this!

    1. And I’m glad that you’re glad. *grin*

      I wonder if those bloggers every wondered where you disappeared to? But I think I probably know the answer.

      Thanks for taking the time to comment. Blog on!

  101. Completely agree. Blogging is almost like an open ended conversation to the world. If someone replies, it’s plain rude not to continue on with a reply yourself. I love where the conversation can go from there..

  102. I agree wholeheartedly with the concept of replying to comments, that is obviously restricted by the amount of comments one receive in the first place…

    Good post.

  103. I started blogging a few days ago..am kinda more into Science..being new I know I will make mistakes and take time to develop myself as a blogger…

    I bumped into your blog and I happen to learn something new….thanks

    Cheers !!!!

  104. I am so guilty of this. In previous blogs before and probably will with this new one, I would very rarely respond to compliments in form of comment. The only time I responded to a comment was if a question was directly asked, additional explaining seemed necessary and in some cases, if I felt it extended the conversation regarding the topic. Other than that, I would quietly read the responses, accepting everyone’s opinion as just that, an opinion but they were always appreciated. I think I just assumed my additional input wasn’t required and no one’s blog-feelings got hurt. Something I apparently need to work on :)

    1. That is one approach. It’s up to the blogger what kind of environment they want to write in, communicate in. And if that’s what makes you comfortable as a writer, by all means do it. Only perhaps a comment or note somewhere explaining that so readers know what to expect. For me, I prefer to be a bit closer to readers.

      Sometimes too close. But that’s just me. *grin*

  105. This touches upon so many things I try to tell my real life friends lol. I never like to talk to brick walls, so why would I write to one? I like comments more than I like the content some of the time.

    1. So true! While I enjoy a well written post, like you, sometimes the comments are more fun to read. And they can take you far off topic, which makes it all the more interesting. Thanks for commenting!

    1. You are welcome. It was a post that I had to write because I was getting a bit peeved. It seems a lot of people have had similar experiences. Nice to see I’m not the only one. *grin*

      Thanks for taking the time to read and comment!

  106. Great post! Great advice! For Pete’s sake, if someone takes the time to comment, acknowledge it! Don’t leave them hanging, wondering if you even saw it, or it’s a cinch they won’t bother the next time.

    (Exception to this rule: You’ve been Freshly Pressed and get hundreds of comments from people you never heard of. Replies to every comment are not expected. Congratulations, btw!!)

    1. Your comment about me not replying? Funny. *grin* I’m afraid for this post replying is obligatory.

      Agree with you 100 per cent. It’s like someone calls you on the phone, you answer…then the sound of crickets.

      1. I noticed you were replying to everyone and I commend you. When I got Freshly Pressed I was totally overwhelmed with comments and the email notifications I was getting for those comments.

  107. That is so true… I’ve stopped following blogs by people who refused to answer my comments… I mean granted not all comments are reply worthy… but when I’ve commented a couple of times and never got nothing… not even a thanks for stopping by… I find it rude and so I go somewhere else… I’ve also had someone once delete my comment which made me mad… I wasn’t being rude… they were talking about a book they’d read and I simply said the means by which the main character was planning to murder some guy made me queasy… and they replied telling me how basically stupid my comment was and then deleted it… I was like seriously… if you can’t take some disagreement… which I’m not even sure that counted as such… then you might not want to put your stuff out on the internet… but luckily for the most part the blogs I’ve come across are nice and like to socialize…

    1. Thanks for stopping by to comment. Isn’t it amazing how many bloggers don’t reply to comments? I’m starting to find it all quite fascinating.

      And your experience with a blogger deleting your comment. Sounds like they didn’t like that you had a difference of opinion. That’s rather sad. Sometimes the best comment conversations happen when you start to share ideas. As long as you both are polite and “listen” to what the other person has to say. If we mind our manners was call always agree to disagree.

      This does not apply to comment trolls. The ones who stop by, drop a nasty comment and then move on to the next blog. Like it’s their mission in life to be cranky. Those I delete with a big old grin on my face.

      1. I know… most of the time it seems to be on really popular blogs… where obviously they already have a ton of followers and I guess they don’t feel like that have to try any more… personally don’t matter how many you get… you should never stop trying to really connect with people… but I also don’t understand how anyone can enjoy just spreading hate the way some people do on the internet… I’ve had to kick a few of those to the curb as well… but I don’t care if someone disagrees with me… I mean sometimes the other party has a valid point and can get you thinking about things in a way you wouldn’t have before… but it’s all good… there are plenty of cool people out there to spend time chatting with I don’t worry about the rest…

        1. I’m starting to think it’s better not to have a wildly popular blog. Keeping it small means keeping it real. And that means staying in contact with your readers. Commenting has become one of my favorite parts of blogging. As long as I’m blogging, I’ll be talking to my readers.

          We cool people can all hang together. *grin*

  108. *PLEASE STOP COMMENTING NOW*
    This makes me a little sheepish as I am a cliche example of a ‘no comment replier’. Although, not on this platform as I’m yet to get the ball rolling on my blog. I’ll use Facebook as an example, a relatable example I’m sure. I post there more for me and my nearest and dearest. To go back to, years down the line and laugh at my anecdotes and #selfies with pets. I hardly post anything there anymore but when I do, replying to attentive ex high school teachers or distant cousins just isn’t practical to me. It’s not that I don’t like them, I’m just begrudgingly indifferent.
    I’m not well read in blog etiquette but I could imagine an alternative mindset when publishing a piece of articulated thought and having somebody unknown to you reply to it. Said unknown contributor could be absolutely anybody, anybody at all. First impressions never die, replying would be naturally beneficial.

    1. I think you’ll find WordPress and Facebook to be two different animals. I find Facebook to be more like a quick hello and WordPress a long conversation over coffee. Both offer a form of communication. Whatever works for you and for many, it’s both.

      You are correct. First impressions linger long after you’ve moved on to another blog. Why leave readers with a bad experience?

      Hope you enjoy your blogging experience. It can be tremendous fun and an excellent venue for thought, discussion, humor, and life in general.

      Thanks for taking the time to comment!

  109. Hello. I couldn’t agree more. I mean, what’s the point of venturing into blogging If you won’t reciprocate your readers written gestures? It’s like posting your cute photo on Facebook and not even thanking your friends for the lovely comments. It’s sad. Thank you for the beautiful blog :) http://wamuyulydia.wordpress.com/

    1. You are very welcome. Very good point about posting your image on Facebook. We need to bring more of the thank you and the welcome back to the blogging conversation.

      Thank you for sharing your comment!

  110. Girl you said it best! When people take the time out to read your blog and reply it’s a beautiful thing. You get the “they like, they really like me” complex going.. And no I’m not a comment friendly blogger. I just got back to writing on my blog.. I stopped my Facebook and IG to focus on reading and writing more..

    Good blog!

    Jasmine

    1. Hey there. Thanks for your comment. Good manners (not only in blogging) is a very attractive quality in a person. For all sorts of reasons.

      Glad you’re back to blogging and hope you enjoy the ride. *grin*

  111. I’m a teacher that requires blogging in place of a traditional paper journal. It helps teach tech skills and writing but digital citizenship is a crazy struggle. They rarely want to share and tend to be trite about what they have to say. Comments always liven up posts that have aged well. Besides if we were really just wanting to write for ourselves, then why make a blog at all.

  112. I never thought people don’t reply comments!! That’s why you’re blogging(at least for me). I want the comments. I love the comments. I always want to know what others think of what I’m thinking about. So those who don’t reply comments are missing a whole lot

    1. Like I said in my post, if you don’t reply to your comments, we’re only getting half the story. There are exceptions of course. If it’s an article that’s going to get 1000 comments, it’s a challenge to get back to every on but even then, a short comment from the blogger explaining why they’re not responding goes a long way to keeping those readers satisfied.

      Thanks for commenting!

  113. I would be a comment friendly blogger if I got comments on my blog. I think you’re addressing only half the issue here. You’re lucky, from the length of this conversation your followers are a chatty bunch. Mine are not. I rarely get comments and they’re generally very short and all I can say in reply is “thanks” or “I agree”.
    I think more people need to take the time to reply to more blogs, to answer the call to conversation that blogs put out there. We need to ask questions and give feedback or the writers are lost.
    I feel lost! I admit it. I don’t know if people are reading my blogs because they never reply, they never converse. I don’t know if I’m offending or enlightening or just boring people.
    So yes, we need reader-friendly bloggers. But we also need blogger-friendly readers.

    1. Hi there and thanks for commenting.

      Most of the comments on this post are from first-time commenters here on Blogdramedy. They found me on Freshly Pressed and yes, they are chatty and fabulous!

      Sounds like you need to increase traffic to your blog and WordPress has some great advice and tips on how to attract readers. It’s also a good idea to read blogs that relate to the topics you write about. You comment and hopefully, they’ll take time to come over to visit your site. You are on the right track by saying we need to ask questions and offer feedback. It’s a two-way street and we need more attentive drivers. *grin*

      1. I’ll look into those resources WordPress is offering. I’ve been attempting to reblog your article but WordPress is giving me an error. I’ll have to come back later and try again.

  114. Wow! You’re really a guru in replying comments, to think that you are replying to every single posts…. btw you have a good writing skill. I’m new in the blogosphere, wish I could get more comments there cos comments are really engaging and exciting. Oh I’m following you now!

  115. I love when people comment on my blog, I put a lot of effort into my posts so I am always completely stoked that not only has someone come to read my piece, but they have taken the time to comment on it. Naturally I always reply back! You can’t leave someone hanging like that, it is totally not right! That is like someone saying you can only eat half of a neenish tart… it’s just wrong!

    1. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this very important subject. Maybe it’s the difference between people who were asked to finish what’s on their plate after their parents cooked a meal from scratch and people whose parents only microwaved dinner. I like to thing we bloggers serve up a nice, tasty meal.

      Respect the commenter and they will respect you. It’s a balanced blog approach. *grin*

  116. An excellent post containing an excellent sentiment. Although uh the number of comments I guess you have given up paid work for a few days to live up to the ideal set for yourself (and any other serious bloggers)

    1. It’s been a wild and crazy week. Still got to pay the bills but I’m fortunate to do communications planning and writing. From anywhere including in my pjs.

      Thanks for liking and taking the time to comment. *smile*

  117. This really got me thinking…
    Maybe the reason some blogs are not as popular as they could be stems from not replying, AND not commenting enough on other posts.
    Thank you so much for this!

    1. I think you might be on to something here. Once you find your “voice” for your own blog, it’s time to go out and chat on other blogs. Who knows who you’ll discover?

      Thanks for taking a moment to comment. And, you are welcome. *grin*

  118. I think that is great way to go about it. Engaging with people is definitely a great way to maintain reader’s interests along with creating a better relationship with them. Is it difficult to get people engaged and to start responding to your posts (At least when you first started your blog)?

    1. A bit of back and forth with your readers is well worth the time.

      It IS difficult to engage readers and it takes time and effort, especially if you want to attract tons of readers. I don’t tend towards gaining new readers as much as paying attention to the ones I have. This post attracted a lot of attention because it was Freshly Pressed and then, once it started making the rounds, it obviously struck a chord with many bloggers. I typically get less than 20 comments on each post and that’s fine with me!

      If you want some tips or help with increasing traffic, check out The Daily Post on WordPress.

      And thanks for stopping by to comment!

  119. I have only had 1 comment on my blog but I replied as soon as I checked. It was good to talk to someone new and it is nice to know that they have made the effort to speak to you first.

  120. Hi . totally agree with you on this. Not replying is an insensitive and non communicative way of interacting through a blog.if you aren’t replying then might as well indulge in a soliloquy a-la Shakespeare.
    Do check on buttrview. wordpress. com

    1. Hi there. Thanks for your comment. No one is an island is a good way to look at it. Without replying to your comments, you’re leaving your readers hanging out there all alone. *grin*

      And, I will!

  121. Awesome! I finally got to read this. Congrats on the Freshly Pressed nod! I try to answer all my comments as soon as I can, and I love those moments when my brain hits refresh. It makes it totally worth it.

    1. Hey there! Thanks for stopping by. I agree completely…I love starting in one place and ending up in another. Sometimes the journey and the destination are equally enjoyable. *smile*

  122. I truly appreciate hearing from the kind and generous (with their time) people who have read a post I’ve written. I really like to know if I am doing any thought-provoking, mind-opening, or heart-breaking within anyone with my topics of discussion. I depend on what others feel, think, or are considering. Those comments ADD to the depth of my posts by commenting and sharing their thoughts. I view a comment as an invitation to open up a little more about who I am, how I became inspired to write that certain piece, and basically give people a chance to see more of my ‘personal me’ and not just a one-dimensional story-teller. Besides, it’s a lovely gift to me…a shared experience, a kind thought, or a simple “Hey thanks for talking about this; I really enjoyed getting a little insight on that world, etc.”
    It helps me to stay with this blogging endeavor and helps me to find new ways to keep them engaged, post after post. There are amazing people in this blogosphere. I make a point to respond back every time, and to thank them often and sincerely. In turn, I am sure to visit their sites and make a comment on the things I felt sincerely about. If I decide to ‘follow’ a blog, I do so out of genuine interest. I make sure to try to look at one item in each, often several items, each week. I’ve gained 5 pounds and my eyes have become glazed over…I never leave my desk! I tend to feel overwhelmed by the number of blogs I hope to stay current on! Guilty, even. :/ I have made some new friends with WP and a few very loyal readers who make my day as they make time for my blog. Time is very precious…I am quite humbled by that.

    1. You totally get what I was saying in this post. We blog for any number of reasons but I think the top reason is to communicate…our thoughts, feelings, opinions. Blogging styles vary…from humor, to the serious. From rants to raves. And everything in between.

      Like you I follow a blogger if I find them to be interesting, amusing, and with a similar sensibility as my own. There are so many out there it’s not hard to find ones to follow.

      And the comment conversation allows you to know them a little bit better.

      Thank you so much for taking the time to share your thoughts. Blog on and enjoy!

  123. Thanks for sharing this. I didnt really put a lot of thought into replying to every comment i got unless i saw oppertunity for deeper conversation or answering questions, but i like how you described it as acknowledging them and making them feel welcomed into the conversation. I didnt start a travel blog to simply brag about my adventures to a mute audience, i started it to share ideas, moments of success and how to survive failures in the hopes that others could learn/ become inspired, and me by them. So thank you for inspiring me to take a more active role in inviting others into the conversation!

    1. Thank you for your comment. Blogging is a two-way street and you’ve got to get in your car and make the rounds. Glad I was able to bring a little inspiration your way.

      Blog on!

  124. This really hits the nail on the head. I am finding this when I try to connect with people via email too (I left facebook, so email is my way of keeping in touch with some people).

    In this world of “advanced” communication…. we are forgetting the very basics of communication.

    1. Hey! Great insight in this comment. “Advanced” communication indeed.

      I have a love/hate relationship with Facebook and now only use it to publicize my posts. I’m also on Facebook in my “real” life because friends were saying I was out of touch. Now I’m so in touch with birthday greetings, boring updates and gossip I think I want to poke my eyeballs out with a sharp fork. *grin*

      Thanks for stopping by!