Writers are tricky and have the best excuses

Thanks for the idea, Tom! You really sake-ed it out of the ballpark with this one.

I’m referring to Tom Clancy…the author of one of my favorite books, The Hunt for Red October (and not a bad movie, either. Sean Connery…da!) Remember Debt of Honor, a Clancy novel that once again featured the wily Jack Ryan of the CIA? The one where the United States is under attack by Japan, only not so much with weapons of mass destruction but rather with the killer idea to cripple the Stock Exchange? Remember Jack’s totally brilliant solution…after the bad guys are toast and the government and bankers are all OH MY GOD, WHAT DO WE DO NOW??? Jack comes up with the idea to start the day’s trading with the stocks value EXACTLY THE SAME as just before the Japanese attempt a sashimi on the SEC. I tell you…that Jack is one smart Irish guy. Not that I have any experience in knowing smart Irish guys. I’ve yet to meet one. Full of themselves, yes. Full of smarts…sadly, still waiting.

So…that’s what I’ve decided to do here today on Blogdramedy. Pretend it never happened. The past 25 or so days of not blogging never happened. I’m in total denial and if you ask me what happened I’m going to say…what do you mean, what happened??? Nothing happened. Except…okay. I’ll tell you one thing that happened and then we’ll just continue as if nothing happened.

Years of working in advertising has left me with the ability to totally ignore ads of any and all kinds. They don’t stick. I buy what I want because I want to…not because some blonde housewife claims that I can save the world from utter and total destruction if only I’d go out and buy the toilet bowl cleaner she’s hawking on national television. I so enjoy making flushing noises when I see those types of idiotic ads. If I see an advertising campaign that makes me sit up and take notice because it’s funny and witty and, dare I say it…smarter than a five year old, I may…MAY…take note and possibly…POSSIBLY…give it a try. I think that’s happened twice.

This is not about one of those times.

This is about the Mister succumbing to an ad by Amazon for the Kindle. I didn’t see the ad and have no idea what was involved but since he went out and bought one almost immediately, I think I’m safe in assuming the ad featured a woman in bed wearing something just this side of sleazy reading erotica on a Kindle.

Or something to do with baseball.

The why doesn’t really matter. It’s the how that is important in this story…damned quick is how. He saw the ad and the next thing I know he’s back from the store with a Kindle.

And now, I have a Kindle, too.

In my case, I did not see an ad featuring Karl Urban on his back in a sun lounger out by the pool covered in nothing but some sun tan lotion and sweat (although if I had, my “that’s happened twice” statement a paragraph or two back would have been a triple hat and faster than you can say “put it on my Visa.”)

Believe me...if I had been able to find a photo of Karl lounging by the pool, I would have used it.

No, it wasn’t an ad. It was the Mister going out and buying an electronic device without three days of research and googling! He just decided he wanted one and went out and bought one. So, of course, I had to go get one as well.

And that’s what I’ve been doing. Kindling. With my Kindle. And spending my entire month’s “entertainment” budget on Kindle edition novels. I’m now trying to decide if I can forego spending money on deodorant and toothpaste so I can buy Stephen King’s new book instead of waiting until the first of May and next month’s entertainment budget. I think I’m gonna go for it…with the Mister and I so engrossed in our new Kindles, who needs to smell good and have onion-free breath? I know, I know. Tapping into next month’s budget is very Ponzi-like but I know that this love affair won’t last forever…they never do. But while the feeling lasts, I’m going to pour on the sun tan lotion and make Karl Urban. Sorry…I mean make LIKE Karl Urban. You know…sitting by the pool getting all sweaty and stuff…reading on my new Kindle.

Next up…what I’ve been reading and a brand new BOOBS!

31 thoughts on “Writers are tricky and have the best excuses”

    1. Well shit. It was your Twitter DM that got me back to blogging and you don’t read my first in a month post?!!! Shame on you and hi back at ya.

      I had no problem reading and posting a comment to your latest effort. *grin*

      1. I’m pleased to accept credit for coaxing you out of Kindle retirement. To the rest of the world: You owe me one!

        This post is so damn weird. First, I love the book The Hunt for Red October. Love it! I might have read it ten times at least. It was written back in the good old days when Tom Clancy’s name on a book meant he actually wrote it. Gasp! I know! So it’s funny you mentioned that.

        And, get this, I’m currently reading Debt of Honor. Weird. So it’s funny you mentioned that.

        For the piece de resistance, I also have been using the Kindle while you were away. (Hey! I had to do something!) No, I didn’t go out and buy a fancy piece of technology that would require actual money. I downloaded the Kindle app on my iPod. I figure it’s basically the same damn thing.

        So many authors have been following me on Twitter and sending me DMs about free books, I checked out Amazon. I’ve learned there are a lot of freebies on there. And the authors on Twitter are happy to let me know when a book of theirs comes up on the freebie rotation. So it’s funny you mentioned that.

        Only three coincidental connections between us in this post? Better try harder next time. You’re slackin’.

        Looking forward to that next post for some strange reason.

        1. You are so my brother from another mother. Only I’m the better looking sibling.🙂

          I love, love, love Red October! Funny but I don’t have the movie on DVD…I must try to track one down. I tried the Kindle app on my iPod but didn’t like reading on such a small screen. The Mister and I are sharing an account so we don’t have to buy two books if we both think we want to read (one purchase.) The only negative is how much I’m spending on books…I think I smell a few servings of Kraft Mac & Cheese in my future. If only I could win that lottery…😉

          Looking forward to back reading some of your posts…I’m sure to learn lots.🙂

  1. Kindles an impulse buy? If you like to read – makes sense. A couple things my human found out when he bought his first Kindles — Don’t leave them on the table at a MacDonalds when you go for another napkin. The Hamburglar eats them. And. Don’t take them shark fishing. One practically jumped off his lap when a big one bit. Last my human figured his Kindle was headed for Mexico in a Black Tip’s gut.

    1. I’m a read-a-holic and used to prowl used bookstores for cheap reads. I’ll still do that but the Kindle is a nice addition to my electronic buffet as long as I keep an eye on how much I’m spending. I like to re-read books and this way I can keep ’em on the Kindle and not all over the house. Good advice on how to keep you Kindle safe from predators…thanks!

  2. WELCOME BACK!! You were totally missed (except for the part when I was in France).

    You know, sometimes maybe you just need a break — and that’s okay. Though, I too love my Kindle. In fact, the other day I started a book (an actually bound book) that’d been sitting on my to-read shelf and I thought “This is so weird reading like this…”. Oi.

    1. It’s nice to feel missed.🙂 Looking forward to catching up and seeing what everyone’s been up to…

      So far so good with the Kindle. Shouts told me he’s downloaded lots of free books so I’m going to ask him for some suggestions. Some of those Kindle editions are more expensive than getting the paperback version mailed to me. How totally rip-off is that?!?! Must go investigate that travesty immediately.

  3. I have no choice. The small screen is all I got, and frankly I’m lucky to have even that much.

    And I am not the so-called “brother from another mother.” That’s gross. You’re actually my sister from another mister! So there!!!

  4. The Kindle is one of the greatest things ever, I read for a month straight after getting mine. Now I am writing for the Kindle but dunno how to make a living at it…..guess I’ll keep trying!

              1. Hmmm the girl I thought was really hot (before I met my wife of course) was Rachel Leigh Cook…but she was lacking in the chest area sooooo…. Katey Perry is probably the one I would pick, I imagine her personality is just awesome!

                    1. That was a play on words…kinda. “Bosom” buddies because of your affection for…bosoms. (Katy over Rachel)😉

                      I’m not on the computer half as much as I should be. I live up north and am currently in sunny Georgia and I’m afraid when it comes to a choice between beach and blog…beach is winning.🙂

                    2. I’ll be back up north in June…at which point I hope it’s even half as warm at it’s been here in Georgia. But I know it won’t be so I’ll be back to blogging more often and working on a “tell-all tale” about my relationship with Kindle. It will be a bestseller!!!

                    3. Sweet if you learn how to market something you wrote for the kindle let me know, I have written one book that has only sold 1 copy…got 37 download when it was on free promo, but I am hesitant to write more books if I can’t make something from it, terrible sounding I know but I got a family to think about.

  5. There needs to be a feature where you can take a break once a year from blogging and everyone promises to be there when you get back. Not that you need it, since you didn’t go anywhere, obviously… But if you had.

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